Consciously Reinventing Masculinity with John Gray, Ph.D. and Arjuna Ardagh

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In today’s culture, the stereotypical man is becoming a thing of the past as men consciously evolve into more balanced beings, leading to more fulfilling lasting relationships with their partners and a better expression of themselves. His “feminine side” is just the beginning of what today’s conscious man explores. Gray and Ardagh offer examples and directions for staying conscious and balanced in this new age of masculinity. The reinvention of masculinity requires an understanding of both male and female energies, needs, chemistry and hormones, and the skills to consciously balance those. Our culture has so emphatically encouraged gender equality that we may have become blind to the real differences that make us unique and complete. John Gray explains, “We can do everything the other sex can do but what’s different is biological. Men and women have different needs based upon our different hormonal systems. So on a biological level, we are very different and if we want to grow an intimacy, if we want to be successful in our lives, we need to respect what behaviors, what interactions, what styles of communication, what attitudes and insights will help men stay on their masculine side as they open their heart. And what behaviors, interactions and ways of communicating will help women stay on their feminine side while they’re also open to manifesting their masculine side.” They posit that, to have a harmonious relationship, each partner has to respect and understand themselves, the other, and the roles each play throughout the experience. Although they can be equal, men and women need not compete for dominion, but rather engage actively in a complimentary manner. Ardagh says, “Let people do what they enjoy…no one can really argue very convincingly that people shouldn’t have the opportunity to fully enjoy life in whatever way they want,” but this is where the meaning of conscious masculinity becomes relative, “because the fact that we have freedom to do whatever we want now means we can choose what’s actually the best dynamic, what’s the best way for us to align ourselves.” (hosted by Justine Willis Toms)


Arjuna Ardagh is a writer, public speaker, and founder of the Awakening Coaching.

Arjuna Ardagh is the author of many books including:

John Gray, Ph.D. is a leading relationship expert. His unique focus is assisting men and women in understanding, respecting and appreciating their differences.

John Gray is the author of:

Gray and Ardagh are co-authors of:

To learn more about the work of Dr. John Gray and Arjuna Ardagh go to or

Topics Explored in This Dialogue

  • What is a “conscious man”
  • What are some inherent differences between men and women
  • What is polarity and polarization
  • How are stereotypical roles of men and women changing
  • What is “imitated masculinity”
  • How are “listening” and “sharing” masculine and/or feminine
  • How do men and women handle stress differently
  • Why do some men turn to pornography for gratification
  • What is the solution to the loss of novelty
  • How do estrogen and testosterone play into a healthy relationship

Host: Justine Willis Toms      Interview Date: 6/26/2016      Program Number: 3586

Music Playlist

From Album: Essential Tri Atma
Artist: Tri Atma
1990 Higher Octave Music #HOMC 7028

Opening Essay: Track 01 Namaskar
Music Break 1: Track 04 Blue Caravan
Music Break 2: Track 04 Blue Caravan (reprise)
Music Break 3: Track 06 Microcosmos